Things I’ve thought at festivals

I’ve been to the Big Day Out and St Jerome’s Laneway in the past week and it reminded be of some recurring thoughts I have at festivals or gigs.

1. “Get off my foot, you fat mole”
2. “Put your arm down, you fat mole”
3. “He’s not Timbaland, seriously, put your fucking hand down”
4. “Why are you here? You’re like 40. Raise your children”
5. “You can’t dirty dance to this, so don’t try. We all know you’re a skank without the dancing”
6. “I get it, you love this band, shut the hell up”
7. “I wonder if anyone will actually do a Springsteen cover”
8. “Fuck, this band started out good, and I said they were good at the time, but now they’re boring and I’m bored. Fuck, can’t yawn, will look like a big fake. Can’t yawn.”
9. “So what, I yawn, I’m human, what are you God? You can read into my mind and tell that I like this band or not. Fuck you. Man these guys are boring”
10. “MY BACK. GOD, MY BACK”
11. “Hot chick and douchebag #39″
12. “Who loves short shorts? I love short shorts”